All About You (Eclipse Edition)

Here I am as Lorene VanderPelt, a combined character in The Time of Your Life. That’s my cousin’s husband John beside me – he played Mac … something, a longshoreman. We had a great time – it was a bit ragged but loads of fun, and I even grew to love the play (with reservations). Sean Haberle came up from NY to play the lead – he was Claudius in Hamlet and Atticus Finch, plus he directed Annie Get Your Gun, and I adore him. He’ll try absolutely anything on stage – he’s fearless, and an absolute sweetheart as well. Like many actors, he’s also IATSE (the stagehands union) to support himself, and right now he’s working on the Colbert show, which he says is lots of fun. He had a couple of Colbert ID cards on his backpack and all of us wanted to steal one (or at least I did and a 16 year old stage crew wanted to, which is about right. I’m like a teenager). Funny thing – the NY stagehands aren’t suppose to make eye contact with the talent. He says Colbert seems great though, and all the people who work with him love him.

But I digress. Happy eclipse day. Don’t look at the sun. Easiest way to see it is look at the reflection in a bucket of water – assuming the sun is out. I intend to float in the pool with my eyes closed, basking in the energy. Except it’s possible that energy might be negative – who knows.

Didn’t write much last week – I had only a few days to spend with Sally, sewing, so I did, and then I was tied up in rehearsals. Today I’m taking an eclipse day, tomorrow I finally go to the big city and do what I need to do, and Wednesday I go straight through to the end of the book.

I’ve said this before, but my main problem is I have too many things I’m dying to do. So many things on the computer I want to watch, so many things I want to sew, books I want to listen to, organizing and decluttering (because I find all sorts of cool stuff), things I’m dying to write. Plus I have to grab the time when it’s limited to spend with Sally (who’s basically the only family I have left from the old days – we grew up together, we knew each others’ parents intimately). Everyone else in my family of origin is gone, and the only one left is Mini-me, who’s now having a lovely if sad time on Martha’s Vineyard (her SIL just died).

So my week is planned. I’m happy. It’s interesting – to someone I might seem bipolar, since I have Major Depression but I’m feel such joy in life. But I don’t have any of the bad things with Bipolar illness (which runs in my family so I know it well). I don’t go on spending sprees. I don’t get nasty (which they often do when they’re on a high). I don’t run on at the mouth. I’m not impulsive.

I see the world full of glorious things, but I think that’s part of my basic nature, and intervals of depression hit sometimes. The thing is, I want to be happy. So I try to notice beautiful and good things, I try to let go of things I can’t change, I’m not a perfectionist (thank God), and being a Taurus (or being me) I love Things. Shiny, bright, dark, rusty – there’s just such a feast of things in this world (which I have to stop collecting but I love passing on things, plus I find ways to use them). Everywhere there’s a richness of life that I don’t have time to get to.  I can’t change my son’s illness or worry about the future when there’s nothing I can do (I think a lot of the last 15 years have been spent weeping and worrying about my children). I can let go. I can grieve and it won’t destroy me.

I’ve always taken Auntie Mame as a role model – “Life’s a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death. Live!”

So that’s my goal for Eclipse Day. I’m just gonna live.

Next week I’ll try to organize my life so I can start doing all the things I want to be doing without feeling like I should be doing something else, but that’s next week. For now my way is clear.

So – any of you in the path of the Eclipse.? (We’re getting 60% – in other words, a typical cloudy day in Vermont). Any of you doing anything to mark it? If I’d thought earlier I would have come up with something significant we could all do. But maybe’s it’s significant enough to live well.

So tell me, what’re you doing for the Eclipse, are you celebrating it in any way, spiritually or otherwise?