God, it is so incredibly gorgeous today (and will be for a few days). You know, Vermont really is as beautiful as the postcards and calendars (at least it is where I live).
Jenny and I ended up watching “Down With Love” which was charming and very funny, and then she found “Who Am I This Time” which I completely adored. Got to be a little after midnight and drove home exhausted but not sleepy, at least. (I fell asleep at the wheel once, and woke up because of the rumble strip, so I’m paranoid).
Actually, I’ll tell you the whole story. I was driving to Lani’s old house in NY state for the first time, and I was picking her and the girls up to drive to Jenny’s in Ohio. I drifted off while driving and the rumble strip woke up (must have been seconds) but it freaked me out. Then, when I was following Grace, my GPS, I got off the interstate and the damned thing took me to a graveyard. It insisted that was my destination.
I’d seen enough Twilight Zone episodes to wonder whether I’d died on the highway and I was ending here. Creepy.
Turns out GPS always said Lani lived in a graveyard. Or everything since then has been an after death dream.
Anyway, I managed to behave for about half the meals (salad for dinner every night). I tried Jenny’s sugar free brownies and they hurt my stomach — clearly I can’t go back to diet sodas even if I wanted to (58 days free of them).
I’ve got to figure out how to balance all the things I have to do. Lani was asking on FB about organizational software. For some reason Things keeps eluding me, and I forgot to have Jenny go over it with me. I guess I’ll have to play with it and ask her specific questions.
Mini-me likes Asana (which is a yoga pose) so I’ll look at that, and Lani chose Trillo which I have and need to play with. But here’s what’s going on:
1. I’m in love with my book and I want to write it. I go to bed at night wanting to read more of it. That’s real love.
2. I need to exercise. Go to the pool, do yoga tapes, something.
3. We start rehearsals on Monday. They’re pretty intense
4. I’m needed for the chorus, so I have two or three times the rehearsals I would have had normally. I do love that part but it really takes the time.
5. I volunteered to help make costumes. That’s just too overwhelming. I have to pull back, but in the meantime I have to scour my sewing room for fabric and notions to donate.
6. the house is in chaos and I need to keep working on it to make space for myself.
7. I need to be able to float in the pool and listen to audio books
8, I want to pay more attention to my eating. It’ll make me feel better.
9. My BFF is coming home and I want to spend time with her.
10. I want to see my grandchildren.
I feel pulled in so many directions. I have books to rewrite (not major, just fix clunky stuff), social networking to do, all the busy work writers need (thank god I’m not going to RWA).
I’ve got to figure out what I can get rid of, and how to incorporate the other things into a fairly crazy life. (I think I have about 4 days off in July at this point).
So after I write I’m going to play with Trillo and Asana and Things and see which works for my style, and which can calm all this anxiety down. Because the anxiety, which has been plaguing me since yesterday when I filled out my calendar for July) only makes it worse.
Oh, on the triumph side, I have now given up eating while I work. Next i have to stop eating at the computer ever (because I’m at the computer a lot) and then stop eating in front of the tv. But I’ve accomplished some really good changes in my eating habits, and if I can keep making more changes like that my physical well-being should really improve.
Okay, pray for me. I’ve got a lot on my plate. Why do women always think they’re superwomen and can do everything?