It’s 4AM on Friday, so I have officially missed all three days I was supposed to post. I’ll get caught up this weekend, but for right now, I’m missing Krissie (it’s like the light leaves the room when she’s gone), and I’ve got the vampire doctor tomorrow (he always drains my blood), but today I saw my nurse practitioner for the first time since she said, “You have diabetes. Things have to change.” Today, she looked at my stats and sat back and said, “I”m thrilled with you.” By their scales (not mine), I’ve lost twelve pounds. I’ve also improved my glucose levels to pre-diabetic levels (still not healthy but so much better) and dropped my blood pressure into the high-normal range. I told her, “I changed my eating; next is exercise,” and she said that was fine. I think she was so happy that I’d actually made changes that she trusted me that I’d move on to exercise. And I will. I just couldn’t Change All The Things at once. She talked about how hard it was to see people with diabetes ignore the changes they had to make, and how frustrating it was because diabetes is an entirely manageable disease. She said, “I have a thirty-six-year-old patient with breast cancer right now, and she’d kill to have diabetes.” And that’s the thing. It’s manageable. The AMD, I can’t do a damn thing about except take my mega-AREDS vitamins and wear sunglasses, and I’m still going to lose my sight. But diabetes? I can kick that. The weight loss has been ridiculously easy because the diabetes meds are appetite killers and because I can’t eat sugar. Turns out, if you eliminate sugar from the diet of a person who sedates herself with the stuff, there aren’t a lot of calories left. I’m actually having a hard time eating the 1400 calories a day I’m supposed to because I naturally gravitate to sweets. I’ve never eaten so much salad and so many apples in my life, and frankly, if I never saw another leaf in a bowl again, I’d be okay with that. But I’m not suffering. And I do think it’ll be easy to maintain since I don’t really have a choice. I’m diabetic. I can’t have that stuff. Moving on . . .
Not dead yet.