Have y’all been to Pintester yet? It’s Sonja Foust, doing wonderful, hilarious things with pins from Pinterest. Basically, it’s Try-It Friday on steroids, any day of the week, and with hilarious results, usually because a recurring theme is, “I didn’t have what the recipe called for, so I used what I had around the house,” which is often a packet of Kool-Aid and a bottle of grain alcohol. It cracks me up every time, because she’s hilarious, and because her substitutions are cute, creative and sometimes only tangentially related to what the recipe called for. (“Recipe called for oranges. I have orange liqueur! Cheers!”) But she keeps truckin’ through, with no ego, and ends up doing some really fun things and being tots adorbs as she does them.
So, keep that in mind as I tell you: This recipe to bake cookies without an oven? I Fousted it.
First things first; I didn’t make the recipe. But I had some pre-made cookie dough in the fridge, so I went with that.
What? That’s totally healthy. All natural ingredients and stuff.
Second things second; I didn’t use the pan. But I saw that she called for 375 degrees, so that’s what I set my countertop griddle to.
And there’s my little helper, Light, who did not lick her fingers at any time during this experiment. I mean that sincerely, although it comes off as sarcastic. But seriously, you should have seen the willpower on this kid.
Third things third… well, I’m gonna let the pictures tell the rest of the story, except the part they can’t tell; that the apartment smelled like burnt marshmallows for a few days.
First, be sure you have a spatula with a Happy Face. Nothing says, “What could possibly go wrong?” more than a happy face.
Next, put cookies on a super-hot surface that only cooks one side, but it cooks that one side veryfast. Veryfast is very important if you want your house to smell like burnt marshmallows for three days.
Then, try to flip the cookies that are already burning on the bottom, but essentially liquid on the top (btw, for those of you playing at home, this is physically impossible), while saying, “It says you’re supposed to cook them like pancakes, and wait for the bubble, but I think these things will burst into flame before there are bubbles so… screw it. I’m flipping now.”
Next step: Watch helplessly as your little countertop griddle is pretty much destroyed.
Put it on a plate for your delighted children, who declare it the best dessert EVER and dub it, “Scrambled Cookies.”
Eat it with your delighted children anyway because we are not a family that throws out cookie dough, even if half of it is uncooked and the other half is burned. What are we, savages?
As your delighted child says, “This would go great on ice cream next time!” you chuckle and say nothing, knowing there will be no next time.
And in the tradition of the Foust, I give you this final word on Scrambled Cookies: