Krissie: So Much Better

That’s a look of relief on my face. Coming up with a plan worked, plus my shrink reminded me of church, which has a couple of comfortable spots, and then a refabber reminded me of Claire’s (the restaurant, not the store). And I cuddled up to Richie and we talked about how mad I’ve been, and my shrink reminded me I had a helluva week, including an 800 miles drive by myself (well, I had SEP with me, telling me stories).
And Richie agreed with me about no more money talk, and we’re going to make it through this. A couple of days ago and it didn’t feel like it. Unfortunately I don’t have the option of going easy on myself. Gotta get the book done. Want to get the book done.
So I’ve got a plan. Which includes writing approximately 3500 words a day, but that can be done. And since I always write the end in a white hot finish, I can do a little less. I just have to be focused and not let all the other shit around me distract me, including the misery of those I love best. Unfortunately.
But I feel so much better now. Getting past my simmering anger at Richie really helps. We really don’t tend to fight, and for a while there it felt as if I was losing everything, including Richie.
But it’s better now.
And in the beginning of November the book will be done, we’ll have our Come to Goddess time and then I’ll stay down with Crusie for a week or so, and we’ll write and talk and try not to shop (well, neither of us can shop) and it will be wonderful. It always is. Crusie and Lani are filling dumpsters and trash bags and goodwill boxes, I’m getting the book done, and everything’s going to work out.
I think having Alex also helped my mood. We made Halloween cookies, we carved a pumpkin, played with Legos. He told me he loved me (he’s good with that) and that my home-made bread was the best.
What more can you ask?
Cold and rainy today, but that doesn’t matter. Bird by bird.
You know, I think I need an “everything’s gonna be all right” soundtrack. Starting with “No woman No Cry” by Bob Marley. Any suggestions?

49 thoughts on “Krissie: So Much Better

  1. Kieran says:

    “Everything’s gonna be all right, rock a bye, rock a bye…!!!”

    That’s the chorus from a great song by hunky one-hit wonder Shawn Mullins called “Lullaby.” The chorus starts at 1:18 on this track:

    Gosh, you look good. I think beneath all the angst and grief, your soul has been moving toward alignment with whatever it is that empowers you. It really does seem that it’s through the pain and darkness that the good stuff comes. I see that over and over.

    “…Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.” Psalms 30:5

  2. Carol-Ann says:

    Gotye’s “I feel better” always makes me happy and I love the lyrics. Hopefully now that this week is over you can start to feel better.

  3. You look good. Relieved. LIke a burden has been lifted. I’m glad you talked with Richie and with your therapist. Let peace descend upon you. Things will keep getting better, I’m sure of it.

  4. julianna says:

    I’m glad you’re feeling better. I was wondering why Richie didn’t go with you to your mother’s memorial service? If that’s too personal, just ignore the question — I just hate to think of you falling back into the pattern of insisting on dealing with everything by yourself instead of letting your loved ones provide support during emotionally draining times.

  5. stephanie says:

    I downloaded “The Princess that Saved Herself” for the kidlets and now I’m enjoying it as much, if not more, than they are.

  6. Simon & Garfunkel music got me through some tough times–probably the soothing voices more than the music.

    But I’ve got loads of upbeat songs in my go-tos. “Walking on Sunshine” by Katrina and the Waves is pretty much pure joy.

    Glad you’re feeling better & good luck with the writing–I’m not one of those writers who writes well under duress, so you’re an inspiration for me:)

  7. I’m listening to the best of Richard Marx. This one makes me laugh and feel upbeat because it’s true. And even though the topic seems depressing I don’t find it so: Don’t Mean Nothing.

    Glad everything is smoothing out for you and that the plan is working, and you have a treat to look forward to at the end of the book.

  8. Molly says:

    The Morning After — Maureen McGovern. Okay, it was from a dumb movie (Poseidon Adventure) but the song is one of hope.

  9. I encouraged him not to go. I was angry, and I wanted some time alone on the road. I was afraid we’d just go over negative stuff on the road. This way I didn’t have to answer to anyone but me.
    But I’m better now. if I was going now, I wouldn’t tell him not to come.

  10. KellyR says:

    I’ve always been fond Santa Monica by Everclear. Any song that contains lyrics like “insane and rising in my own weird way” is alright by me.

    Of course when I’m really down, I always fall back on Rock and Roll Suicide by David Bowie. If only because the memory of clutching it to my angsty teen bosom invariably makes me start to giggle. YMMV.

  11. Office Wench Cherry says:

    I really like Shade by Joe Nichols. On a completely different note, for sheer upbeatness you really can’t beat the Glee-ified version of just about any pop song out there. Also there’s Feeling Good by Nina Simone.

  12. I tend toward my happy childhood tv theme songs. The Partridge Family “Come on Get Happy” The Brady Bunch My Three Sons which I just hum for obvious reasons

    Then there is “Walking on Sunshine” by Katrina & The Waves and “Send Me on My Way” by Rusted Root and what about “Feeling Groovy” (Actually the 59th Street Bridge Song, but really who calls it that?) by Simon and Garfunkle? I’d also go with “Cecilia” because I just love that song and “Sugar, Sugar” by the Archies.

    I love Defying Gravity, 500 Miles, and Dog Days Are Over, too. Now I need to go and listen to some of these other songs that I don’t know.

  13. oneoftheotherjennifers says:

    This – Darius Rucker (’cause what we go through makes us who we are, and we like us)

    I’m Yours – Jason Mraz (’cause it’s good to keep things in perspective)

    Born This Way – Lady Gaga (’cause we are who we are, and everyone else can go fuck off)

    Love’s Divine – Seal (’cause it’s good when the rain passes)

    Garden Party – Rick Nelson (’cause you can’t please everyone, so you’d better please yourself)

    Soak up the Sun – Sheryl Crow (’cause it’s not getting what you want, it’s wanting what you’ve got. Everyone needs to lighten the hell up. 🙂 )

  14. Jen Wyatt says:

    “Where is a Woman to Go”, sung either by the late great Dusty Springfield or by its creator, the incomparable KT Oslin.

  15. Safri Duo with Michael MacDonald – Sweet Freedom.

    Queen – It’s a Kind of Magic.

    Tempted to go look at the cds, but am gonna keep snug. Sinus washout completed and life realignment in progress 😉

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